Tough

Today was a tough day for me. Every little thing seem to set me off. I've had to walk away several times just so I dont blow up.

It at times felt like the world was closing in on me....I was at a breaking point it seemed like.


Im so frustrated that no one cares that I work my tail off attempting to keep things clean..things organized...it seems like they would rather live in a dirty house than anything else. Its frustrates me that I cant invite friends over at the drop of a hat b/c I have to worry about how messed up the house is...that when someone knocks on the door that I have to go outside to talk that I cant open my door without fear of them seeing the dangers that lerk behind me....the toys that they could trip over...the ground up goldfish that can get stuck to the bottom of their shoes...that a kid could come screaming by and knock them over without a second thought...

I used to be able to keep up with the house work pretty good while one was in school...then I just had only 1 kid to pick up after all day long...but now that summer is here I have both kids home and they seem to destroy everything in their path...even if I had just picked up that room.

Am I crazy? is my frustration justified?! Sometimes I think so...sometimes even I think Im crazy...but today was just one of those days where functioning took every last bit of energy I had in me and even then....it wasnt enough...